1 Month Postpartum
My baby boy is 1 month old.
The month of October passed by in a blur for me. While there were certainly some long days over the last month, our time with Atlas is flying by. I was talking to my sister today and she reminded me that while the days seem long, the years are short and as I reflect on this last month I can see the truth behind that statement.
Here’s what’s been going on with Atlas for the last month…
My baby boy was selected to be a newborn model for one of the most amazing photographers in NYC.
I know I’m his mom, so I’m totally biased but isn’t that one of the cutest photos you’ve ever seen? He’s like a little woodland fairy.
Dave, Atlas and I drove to New Jersey 2 weeks ago to meet with the photographer in the most beautiful park filled with nature trails. The fall foliage was gorgeous and Dave & I both agreed we would love to make the short drive (only 30 minutes from NYC) back to the park to take the dogs hiking on the trails before the fall season is over.
I also got to pose for a few shots with Atlas and I was amazed by how good the photos turned out. It was fun playing ‘dress up’ with my little boy. I’m certainly no model, but perhaps Atlas has a future as a Gap Baby or Gerber Baby? 😉 Spoken like a true mom, right? I’m judging myself right now. I’m one of THOSE mom. Geez.
Atlas also attended his first race during his first month of life and it was a pretty big race…
Sunday we walked down to Central Park to cheer on the runners of the NYC Marathon at the finish line. It was so inspiring to see people cross that line and reach their goal. I could have sat there all day and just watched the faces of the runners as they saw the finish line. So motivating. Atlas wasn’t impressed though. He slept through the entire thing.
Atlas is growing like a weed. He grew 10 ounces in 6 days after his birth. He loves milk, bath time, being carried up and down stairs (bye bye baby weight), watching TV with Dave, stroller rides through the park and cuddling with me at night. He hates being cold, getting out of the bath, my singing and slobbery kisses from Ob & Marley.
He is such a sweetheart and I feel more blessed with each day that passes that I get to be his mom and watch him grow. Such a gift.
For me this last month has been a roller coaster, which from what I hear is pretty normal.
The first 2 weeks following Atlas’ birth were definitely the toughest emotionally and physically. I shed a lot of tears during those first few days. It was tough to feel confined to the house due to a baby’s feeding schedule…not to mention it hurt to walk for a while. Breastfeeding was incredibly difficult for me too. Atlas ate like a champ and had no problems latching on, which I’m so thankful for. However, I was in excruciating pain for 3 straight weeks. Honestly, I would rather go through labor again (with the epidural of course) than go through those first 3 weeks of breastfeeding. There were so many times over the last month that I would sit on the couch feeding Atlas and sob (think UGLY cry) because it hurt so bad. Also, for 3 straight weeks I pretty much never wore a shirt. Our house was like a nudist colony (TMI?). It hurt to have anything touch me so that contributed to me being confined to the house. I tried everything (lactation consultants, creams, soothing gels, salt water, etc) and nothing worked. Finally, we started supplementing some of Atlas’ feedings with formula, which gave me a chance to heal and luckily things are getting MUCH better. Atlas currently gets anywhere from 1-3 bottles a day and nurses for all his other feedings and that seems to be working great for now.
My mom came to stay with us for a week and once she arrived my emotional state got a lot better.
She cooked, cleaned, walked Ob & Marley, did laundry and watched Atlas so I could catch up on some much needed sleep. Without a doubt – the best thing she did while she was here was encourage me. She told me it was okay if I decided not to breastfeed, which was exactly what I needed to hear. Even though I’m still breastfeeding Atlas (& I hope to for a few more months), it felt good to have someone reiterate to me that breastfeeding didn’t make me a ‘better’ mom. In my mind, I was convinced my ability as a mother hung on whether or not I could breastfeed. So silly. She took care of our entire family and definitely breathed life into our home. Such a sweet blessing.
If you ever have a baby and need a pick-me-up, I highly recommend calling my mom.
Atlas and I are falling into a groove this week (as much as possible with a newborn) and I’m getting more confident every day with him (although yesterday was a real doozy – kid cried most of the day and I still have no clue why). I’m learning his schedule and his cries and for the most part, every day gets a little easier.
Dave is a tremendous help, incredible support system and amazing father. On days when I’m feeling overwhelmed because I haven’t had time to shower or eat, Dave comes home from work and immediately takes Atlas and tells me to take a break. He’s a keeper, I tell ya.
Physically, this is the first week I’m starting to feel like my old self again. In fact, I worked out today! Burpees, mountain climbers, froggers and lots of ab exercises made their way back into my life and I couldn’t be happier about that. I plan on writing a post documenting my thoughts on my body after baby soon. I’m still taking it easy for the next 2 weeks (doctor’s orders), but I feel like I could go run which isn’t something I’ve felt for quite some time! Yay!
This last month has taught me a lot. I’m learning to ask for help (major weakness for me). I’m learning that if I’m going to survive motherhood I’m going to need lots of help, patience, dry shampoo, caffeine, chocolate…and a whole lot of Jesus. Since becoming a mom, I’m pretty much in a constant state of prayer.
Our new life with Atlas isn’t easy, but it is so sweet and I can’t wait to share more of this journey with you. And on that note, I’m off to feed my sweet boy and rock him to sleep (my favorite part of the day). There is nothing better than a baby falling asleep on your chest. NOTHING.