3 Months Postpartum
We are officially done with the ‘4th trimester!’ And can I just say, the 4th trimester was harder than any half marathon I’ve ever ran. It also brought with it a greater reward than crossing a finish line ever gave me.
Atlas is now weighing in at 16.5 pounds and he grew 1 whole inch over the last month. He’s such a chunk and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Those baby rolls melt my heart.
I feel like Atlas has developed more this month than in the last 2 combined. He is now reaching for things, holding his head up better, laughing out loud (←my absolute favorite) and he pretty much always has his hands in his mouth.
Simply put: He’s just starting to seem more human. You know…as compared to a super cute blob. He actually interacts with us. Smiles at us. Follows our voices. It has been amazing to watch him develop both physically and mentally. It truly feels like a gift to watch him grow.
Even though our days aren’t easy, they are getting easier and I’m more thankful each day that I have the opportunity to stay home with Atlas and watch him learn. He is still a great little sleeper and just in the last 3 weeks, our evenings have become a bit more tolerable (read: He doesn’t scream for 3 straight hours). Hallelujah!
I think I’m falling into a better stride with this whole motherhood thang too. I’m learning Atlas’ cries and getting better at soothing him and just reading him in general. I’m still no expert, but our good days typically outweigh the doozies now. I mean…we still have doozies…on New Years Eve I actually called Dave for the first time ever and asked him to come home from work early because I needed a break THAT bad. Luckily, I married a gem and he came to my rescue like the true hero he is and after a few hours to myself I felt much better. But just keeping it real…there are still days when Atlas cries and by the end of the day I’m crying too. Thankfully, those days just aren’t as frequent now and there is a lot more laughter thrown in the mix.
I am still running and working out when our schedule and the weather permits and releasing those endorphins makes a world of difference in my mood and confidence. At this stage, I’m pretty happy when I get 4 workouts in a week. This week I’m hoping to start going to the gym a few days and leaving Atlas in childcare. We’ll see though…I’m convinced the gym childcare rooms are a breeding ground for germs so I’m a bit apprehensive.
One thing that really helped me during this season was this sermon. It is titled “How to Love the Mud” and it convicted me and challenged me to approach my new role as a mom with a different attitude. I’m slightly OCD and I tend to obsess over everything being neat, tidy and in the perfect place. This has never been a huge issue because I had the time and energy to make sure everything was neat, tidy and in the perfect place. However, Atlas has basically flipped my OCD world upside down and now I barely have time to eat…much less keep the house immaculate. And when our house gets messy I am prone to meltdowns where I end up crying to Dave telling him that our entire life is messy because apparently in my world a messy house = a life out of control. Yes, I’m such a treat and he does know how lucky he is to have married me. How to Love the Mud encourages you to think about the meaning and miracles in your messes. For example; My house is messy because there are baby toys all over the place. The reason there are baby toys all over the place is because God has blessed me more than I ever thought possible with a healthy baby boy who is growing and playing. And I get to be home to entertain him with all those toys that we can afford because my husband works so hard. There is someone out there right now who would kill for the mess I’m in. Someone who wants a baby so much that the thought of a home that looks like a daycare sounds like heaven to them. So not only should I not complain and flip out over my messy house…I should actually stop during the day and thank the Lord for the gift that my mess represents. It is truly a miracle that I’m lucky to be a part of.
So, I’m working on letting the messes go and enjoying the miracle that is Atlas and it is helping me become a better mother and a better wife. Word.
But on that note, my little miracle is sleeping and these floors aren’t going to mop themselves so I better get to that! That’s just good hygiene, people! 😉
I do want to leave you with this video of Atlas laughing. I dare you to watch this and not smile. I double dog dare you.